August 22, 2017
During our vacation, Dante rarely does his random scream out of nowhere thing that scares the out of you.  But this morning at breakfast at the Bayline Diner he did just that.  He was upset that his chocolate chip pancakes weren’t the same as when I make them. (And I tried them, they pretty much sucked) We did breathing exercises with him and I gave him that look that my old man gave me.  (He’s autistic but he’s still a kid who needs to know at times, enough is enough) He settles down and all is well.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see another family sitting and looking over. We get this from time to time, mostly from other kids which I understand (they get a pass) but when adults stare, it pretty much pisses me off. I don’t want to make a scene, we are on vacation but I look up again and the father (Who looks a lot like Kingpin from the Dare Devil comics) keeps staring.  I immediately look away bc if I don’t I am going to get all Jersey on him.  I focus on my waffle and as always Dante.

Before I know it I feel a tap on my shoulder.  It’s Kingpin, he says “hey just to let you know we are an autism family too and we totally get it.”  I shook his hand and I started to tear up.  His wife later came over and we started to get to know each other.  We related with each other as only two sets of Autistic parents could.

They are from Pennsylvania and their daughter is nonverbal.  They too had to fight with their school district to get her the proper services necessary for her education.  They adopted her when she was three days old.  I could only imagine how hard their journey was so far.  Similar in some regard but totally different and unique, just like every child with autism.  I was so happy he came up to talk to me, it was good to meet another Autism Family and bond with fellow kindred spirits.

Inner Balance is proud to announce Autism Family Group Therapy coming this March.

Anthony D.
Autism Advocate

---

July 16, 2015

Went to the podiatrist with Angelina yesterday. The assistant was an older lady who was talking with Ang about what grade she’s going into and her summer, she was very nice. As she walked us to the exam room she noticed Angelina’s t-shirt. “2015 Walk For Autism, did you do that? she asked. Angelina answered ‘yes’ with a proud smile. The lady replied, “that’s so nice that you did that for those people”. (I don’t think she meant anything by it, but my knee-jerk reaction was, “what do you mean those people?” Angelina replied, “oh yeah well my brother is one of those people.” I was cracking up and couldn’t have been more proud of my little girl.

Autism can affect a family in various ways. All too often it’s a challenging ordeal for everyone involved. It takes patience, understanding, strength and more patience for an Autism Family to accept, transition and thrive.

Inner Balance is proud to announce Autism Family Group Therapy coming this March.

It seems these days that there can be an endless list of duties, responsibilities, tasks and obligations. Often these seemingly never-ending lists of things to do can cause us *some* stress. Sometimes we’re not even aware of the toll such stress takes on us because we are so wrapped up and busy trying to check things off the list, just to be distracted again my new items that somehow keep getting added. Learning some tools to help cope with the busy demands of life can be worthwhile in helping us achieve a healthy work-life balance. Below are some tips to help achieve just that:

1- Mindfulness: try being mindful of whichever activity you are choosing to focus on. For example, if you’re washing the dishes, stay focused and present on just the dishes. Notice what the water feels like on your hands. Pay attention to the soapy bubbles all over the dishes. When you notice other thoughts pop up in your mind, like the laundry that needs to be turned over or the car mechanic that needs to be called because of the light that went on in your car, focus your attention back to just the dishes. Research suggests that we cannot do multiple tasks nearly as well as we can one task at a time. Gently remind yourself that you are staying focused on just one activity at a time and that you will get to the other activities when you are able.

2- Take purposeful and intentional mini-breaks throughout the day. These breaks can be times spent going for a brisk walk, practicing some deep breathing, listening to some music, calling a friend for a quick chat etc. We are not the energizer bunny, we cannot just keep going, going and going. We all need breaks here and there. Knowing throughout our busy lives and schedules that we have a few mini breaks throughout the day can help give us the energy and perspective to put the effort into what we need to do and look forward to having a little respite.

3- Remember to laugh and not sweat the small stuff. Ever face an unexpected work or social or personal dilemma that seemed so embracing at the time? Ever look back months or years later and laugh at the silliness of the situation? Try to remember that whatever we face in the moment, we likely won’t feel as strongly upset or embarrassed or annoyed at some time later. Don’t sweat the small stuff, keep it all in perspective and focus your energy on what you decide truly matters.

It is that time of year again when school has begun. After a month into the school year, students and parents have been adjusting to the academic year. Adjustment to another school year is often accompanied by stress and anxiety. While many manage their stress and anxiety related to doing homework, taking exams, and balancing family life and extracurricular activities, some find themselves feeling stressed out and worried how to juggle everything.

At this point, you may hope to have developed a routine schedule and manage to balance all responsibilities in a healthy way as to continue moving forward towards personal goals. As you can imagine, this can be difficult task. Therefore, it is not uncommon to experience anxiety and stress related to daily life demands.   Common anxiety symptoms you may experience are: difficulties with concentration, irritability, procrastination, problems with sleep, racing thoughts, and worrying. There is no need to struggle alone.

Some helpful suggestions:

1. Get a planner to get organized. Write down assignments/plans, deadlines so you know what to expect ahead of time.
2. Schedule a fun, relaxing activity to reward yourself
3. Take care of your health- Make sure to get enough sleep, limit junk food, and exercise
4. Talk to someone who cares (e.g. mom, dad, close friend, and/or therapist ☺)

Therapy can be a wonderful opportunity to learn coping skills and strategies tailored to your needs which can improve your ability to manage stress and anxiety. Contact Inner Balance today to get in touch with a professional to help you.

– Stephanie Manning, Psy.D.

Welcome to the New Year! Often, at the start of a brand new year, we find ourselves thinking and creating a list of goals that we would like to accomplish. Being mindful of goal-consistent choices and breaking goals into small, more manageable concrete steps can be a great way to help ourselves accomplish our goals. Below are some tips on how to do just that!

Below is an example (setting a goal to run a marathon) using the SMART acronym.

S: Specific: I would like to run a 5K.

M: Measurable: running 3x per week to prepare, starting with running 1 mile each time and increasing a mile each month.

A: Action-Oriented: preparation for the big event; exercise, stretching, running on different terrain, etc

R: Realistic: taking months of time to physically prepare for the demands of a 5k.

T: set a Timeframe: would like to accomplish this goal after approximately 6 months of training.

The SMART acronym can be helpful in setting some basic parameters in reaching goals that we set for ourselves. It is often found that breaking a big goal (a 5K marathon) is more likely to be achieved when we break down the preparation into down into small, more manageable goals- i.e., practicing each week, being realistic about how long it may take, and setting specific mini goals to help achieve it (researching workout preparations, talking to others who have done this before, etc). Most importantly, don’t beat yourself up if you miss a mini-goal for the week or don’t achieve your desired goal for the day. It’s okay J Allow yourself to have a break every once and a while and then be mindful of trying again tomorrow. Be mindful also of the progress you have made thus far, and that you have set your eyes on a goal to begin with. Practice makes progress and achieving goals often take time. Try to enjoy the journey and not just the goal J Also, try to elicit a little humor here and there. It helps to keep stress in perspective.

Happy New Year and congratulations on setting new goals!